March 2011
2 posts
The (depressing) facts of life →
Every time you leave home, your plants attempt to commit suicide.
January 2011
4 posts
30 things I did before I turned 30 →
Became insanely popular. Joined the right sorority. Shared a mattress with the right guy. Wielded the awesome power of the wealthy, young and beautiful. Became the asshole I hated when I was a loser.
NO PANTS PARTY!!!
What Wine Will Fix →
Hangovers – Wake up feeling like the undead? Point yourself in the direction of a champagne bottle. Add a splash of OJ or two and you’re only 15 minutes away from getting drunk again
December 2010
12 posts
How Dan Savage ruined my sex life →
When two teenagers fall in love it seems only right that you would share EVERYTHING, no matter how repulsive.
Guide to a happy/albeit chaotic life →
Pack up everything you own. Now repeat 7 times.
SPARKLE NEELY SPARKLE!!!: this is my christmas... →
sparkleneelysparkle:
so Elizabeth just posted this on her blog about MK and i feel compelled to share with you my favorite story about MK of all time. i have told many people this story in person and i have no qualms telling it here. if you’ve heard it, i am sorry. its somewhat better in person and if my flip…
As god as my witness, this is my favorite Olsen story.
The Stages of Living in LA →
”I NEED THAT MOTHERFUCKING CONVERTIBLE.”
“And once again, the people who made the ultimate Southern California bargain,...”
– http://www.latimes.com/news/local/la-me-big-rains-20101223,0,5975115.story&h=9aff3
The awful truth about hooking up →
Yeah don’t act like you haven’t done it.
How prom ruined our lives →
Because prom effed us up.
March 2009
2 posts
This is one of those days where you're like fuck...
Too legit, too legit to quit.
It's a beauiful day in the neighborhood.
It’s 77 bitches.
February 2009
146 posts
I didn't do anything I planned to do today except...
So not really a waste of time, right?
Futon + swirl pinkberry + watching tv on my...
Fuck fruit on the bottom yogurt.
I inadvertently feathered my bangs with a new blow...
“Though Stefan lost and Carla bit it hard, both of them leave Hosea in the dust,...”
– Gawker
Way Down in the Hole
piercethenight:
hierarchy of theme songs to The Wire:
Season 3 (Neville Brothers)
Season 2 (Tom Waits)
Season 1 (Blind Boys of Alabama)
Season 4 (Ivan Ashford, Markel Steele, Cameron Brown, Tariq Al-Sabir, and Avery Bargasse)
Season 5 (Steve Earle)
I’m a season 2 theme song fan myself …
subject lines of some e-mails I've sent since...
“sacrilegious? maybe. hilarious? yes.”
“proscuitto puff pinwheels”
“word to your mother!”
“spice girl news”
“what do you mean, you don’t eat no meat”
“tequila, bears shirt?”
“storm, parking?”
“Top random facts about chuck norris”
“got to keep on dancing”
“One more beer...
“tell me lies, tell me sweet little lies…”
– (via msbojangles)
Oh no you can’t disguise.
Things that rhyme with Rourke (as in Mickey)
Fork
Cork
Torque
dork (hee hee)
pork (yum)
Things that almost rhyme with Rourke
Mallorca (if you drop off the “a” or say it quietly)
quark
stork
The LA Snuggie Pub Crawl is March 21
youcankeepthechange:
thefondest:
youcankeepthechange:
Unicornfandance you better get over here with your homemade Snuggie in time! I am constructung my rainbow Snuggie as we speak.
Oh. My God. I smell a musical…
Erika and the Technicolor Snuggie.
SARAH IF YOU DON’T START WRITING THAT SCREENPLAY UP RIGHT NOW I AM COMING TO TULSA TO WRITE IT FOR YOU.
Finally I get to say it: That’s...
